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 TV Character Bios

KINISKI,  Lewis
(The Drew Carey Show)
c/o Warsaw Tavern
Cleveland, OH
http://www.lewishotbod.com

Lewis is a janitor at the DrugCo Pharmaceutical Company. He is allergic to fish and strawberries, believes in alien abduction, has an IQ of 162, loves the sci-fi shows Star Trek and Babylon 5 and drives a 1973 AMC Matador.

Ryan Stiles as Lewis Kiniski
 

Lewis is a Third Level Warlock in the Church of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer, an expert on bizarre trivia about serial killers and a huge fan of the Browns Football team. But when they left Cleveland, no one understood the tattoo on his ass when he dropped his pants.

Lewis lives above the Warsaw Tavern. When Lewis wants a beer, he just opens up a trap door in the floor and asks the bartender to throw him a brew. On Wednesday nights, Lewis conducts a “Beer Robics” class at the Warsaw Tavern where the participants combined the benefits of exercise and drinking beer.

Lewis hangs out with friends Drew Carey, Kate O'Brien and Oswald Harvey. They are co-partners in a microbrewery operation that produces a local brew called "Buzz Beer" in the garage of his friend Drew Carey. Buzz beer is the house brand at the Warsaw.

Lewis' best friend is Oswald Lee Harvey, a Global Parcel deliveryman. They have known each other since high school. They do everything together and have been mistaken as a gay couple because they are so weirdly close to one another.

Lewis used to live in a run-down apartment with Oswald but his lease was canceled when his friend Drew complained to the landlord to fix the dump. Lewis and Oswald then moved above the Warsaw Tavern and later into a house built illegally in the middle of a local park because women are turned off by the fact that they lived above a bar. After an eagle followed Lewis to the park and made its nest on the roof, their house became a protected site.

When Oswald gets upset, Lewis uses a sock puppet named Professor Von Sock to sooth and cajole his buddy. To earn extra money Lewis and Oswald don elf costumes and work as Santa’s Helpers during the Christmas season at Winfred-Louder department store. Other job ventures find Lewis and Oswald trying to "milk" snakes and sell their venom; administering an experimental DrugCo drug that causes empathy to prison inmates; and starting a home-based cookie business.

The Cast of THE DREW CAREY SHOW
Lewis hugs his pals Drew, Kate, Mimi, Nigel & Oswald

In high school, Lewis didn’t have a single date. He took the job as yearbook photographer just so people would look at him. According to Lewis the first time he had sex it was with ‘some woman in a bar.” For a time, Lewis dated a girl from work called Pinkie “a.k.a. “The Guinea Pig Girl” because she volunteers for drug experiments.

Once, Lewis was attracted to an attractive bank teller so every week, he withdrew $10,000 from the bank‘s ugly teller and re-deposited the money with the pretty teller. After a number of transactions Lewis hoped the good looking one would think he was a millionaire and go out with him.

Despite his many attempts at love, Lewis still hasn't found the right partner. That's because, in general, most women find Lewis "creepy." A typical Lewis pick-up line: "If you really think about it kissing is like putting your lips to the "sweet" end of 66 feet of intestine."

At work, Lewis has to interact with a strange assortment of creatures that live within the company's walls. They include a giant English-speaking cockroach, hologram dogs, a creature that is half monkey and half hippopotamus (a Monkopotamos), a clone of Lewis, a former circus bear who knows how to drink beer, and an Epiphany Ball that makes whoever holds it very perceptive.

Once, to help Oswald earn some extra money for his financially troubled mother, Lewis enrolled Oswald in a "Man Boobies" implant experiment that gave Oswald female breasts for a month. Oswald earned an additional fee for posing topless for the DrugCo calendar. In his spare time, Lewis teaches chimpanzees to sing “On the Good Ship Lollipop” for the company’s talent show. Lewis later got promoted to janitorial manager.

After the EPA shut down a project that exposed DrugCo workers to toxic materials without informing them of their risk, Lewis got demoted back to Janitor because he and his friend Drew were responsible for leaking the information to an environmental activist. For fun, Lewis and Mr. Hathaway, the president of DrugCo, like to toss a Frisbee in the park.

Lewis’ family included his divorced sister Janet [a statistician], her daughter Monica, and their mother, a kooky old woman that [according to Lewis] takes in stray animals and sleeps on a bed of rotting newspapers. She became a taxidermist and as a child would stand over Lewis’ bed with a pillow and threaten to suffocate him as a joke. Her husband planted Tequila on his pregnant wife while crossing the border and Louis (a Capricorn) was born in a Mexican prison.

Lewis claimed to be adopted once. When asked about his ancestry Louis confesses “I come from Eastern European stock. We’re awkward and clumsy folk who can barely reproduce.”

In March of 2000, Lewis discovered he fathered a baby (Robert) by a former girlfriend named Sherry he met at tap dance camp. Robert was now married, college-aged with a wife and a newborn (Emily). Both Oswald and Lewis had relations with Sherry and the question of fatherhood was in question. But Robert was tall, and geeky looking so Lewis had to be the dad. To be fair and to keep their friendship in tack, Lewis and Oswald refused to view the DNA evidence and became co-fathers and co-grandfathers.


THE DREW CAREY SHOW/ABC/1995-2005

Drew Carey as Drew Carey
Ryan Stiles as Lewis Kiniski
Diedrich Bader as Oswald Lee Harvey
Christa Miller as Kate O'Brien
Kathy Kinney as Mimi Bobeck
Cynthia Watros as Kellie Newmark
Craig Ferguson as Nigel Wick
John Carroll Lynch as Steve Carey
Nan Martin as Mrs. Dotty Louder
Jenica Bergere as Sharon Bridges
Ian Gomez as Larry Almada
Tim O'Rourke as Tim
Kelly Perine as Chuck
Kevin Pollak as Mr. Bell
Katy Selverstone as Lisa Robbins
Johnnie Walker as Bernard
Kate Walsh as Nicki Fifer


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